Comments - 2010

 

As Launch Day 2010 approached our house was buzzing with anticipation - Whom could I fool one more time - Who would catch on that The Burning Man Services keep getting posted by the same person year after year.  We received lots of submitted services and lots & Lots of comments.  Here listed are the ones I could get in the flurry of the first few days after 04/01/10.

Burning Man to offer Gated Communities in 2010

We have listened to your feedback; we have heard your concerns about unwanted folks wandering into your camp, cutting thru to get to the next street and the security of your valued possessions. Burning Man’s Metropolis 2010 layout will include Gated Communities, strictly controlling ingress and egress for pedestrians, bicycles, and mutant vehicles to ensure that your camp, your Playa Gear remain safe & secure.

To enter a gated community a person must be a registered resident with photo ID or the person must have a friend in the gated community who gives specific permission to the security guards at the gate to that effect. Art grants are available for design submissions for the three main entrances into the Gated Community, Berlin, Moscow & Tokyo; Deadline is 04/01/10.

Nevada’s Happy Cows Return Gift to Burning Man

For years Northern Nevada’s dairy industry has benefitted from the annual Burning Man Festival with donations of tons of food scraps left behind by those that camp in the Black Rock Desert. Now it is time  for them to return the gift. The Cow Union and Dairy Farmers have finished an agreement that will provide Fresh Milk (Whole & 2%) to the Center Camp Café and will be setting up a daily Playa-wide delivery schedule. Gone are the days of powdered creamer!!

Sign up today and have Fresh Milk with your coffee, a win-win for both Nevada’s Happy Cows and all who enter the gates of Black Rock City.

Thanks Scott! Started reading about the cows and was going 'wow, I didn't know that' and then I remembered the date. I was in a corporate conference in a large room with a speaker and it was very quiet. I immediately started cracking up once I remembered it was the 1st and the joke was on me. It also turned some heads in the conference cause I started laughing during a serious topic from the speaker. Rather than being embarrassed, I just smiled cause it made me remember that warm fuzzy happy feeling when I am home among my burner friends. Thanks again for making my day brighter!  
Re: Burning Man Services - 2010 - On Playa mikd delivery?! Crap, I'm out of a job!- PS - Great job Scotto!  
Scotto, I love you :). Can you please provide more information about the BRC storage. It would be a HUGE benefit to many a burner!!!! Hugs :)  
Thanks for the heads up Scott. My camp is always filthy. I'll certainly look into the Playaclean service.  
Thanks for always making my burn special... so much to look forward to when I get there. I can almost feel the wet playa between my toes...  
Playa Clean job applicants must be able to: Perform physical activities that require considerable use of your arms and legs and moving your whole body, such as climbing, lifting, balancing, walking and stooping  
That eliminates me. Especially all that talk of balancing and stooping.  
It's a typo, I believe he meant "schtupping," not "stooping."  
Elitist gated communities. This is Black Rock? Welcome to Metropolis!  
On account of my disgust at Burning Man selling out like this, I'm cancelling InterFuse. :-( See you at the Rainbow Festival.  
In honor of the Happy Cows, Bad Idea Theater will be serving the fresh moo-juice in our highly-acclaimed White-Out-Russians. Oh Happy Daze!!!  
Great sites!!! :)  
Oh thank God! I've been advocating for years that BRC create a Participant Profiling Program. Such a program would allow the swift identification of "those people" and provide internment camps to adequately separate them from us for the duration of the Burn. Gated communities and walled villages are the first step towards keeping our city safe from dirty hippies, nudists and all forms of Godless Heathenry and Monkey Business.  
And, maybe we could entice our beloved Sheriff Joe to conduct a non-discriminatory, illegal camper sweep.  
Hey, I'm all for this gated community thingee. But along with the guards we'll also need video cameras, lots of video cameras.  
We have to also check everyone's ID. We can't let in terrorists in if they don't have an ID.  
And, we should also get one of those full body scanners that seem to be the rage at all the airports. We could have everyone go through, even if they don't have clothes on.  
April Fools joke? Man, I would l've a massage or a hot air balloon ride at Brc. Hmmmm  
Once again, a great job, Scotto! I have just sent it off to the Kidsville list.  
You win. Ten out of ten for detail! Best 4/1 prank I've seen yet!  
First I said, " What?!?"," the f?" - Then I thought, " Oh Yeah! - Happy April 1st to You as Well !!- I appreciate your Fun-Loving Spirit!  
You know that fewer cows would mean a slower burn for all of us. I love you, BM! [That's Bowel-Movement to you and me...] - Hope you are well and sometimes play the fool!  
You make the best prank BM pages. ;)  
Sounds interesting. Perhaps residents could also get permanently tattooed with their "registration" number or as an option, some sort of suppository chip embedment.  
Hey man you forgot Beijing, the Chinese Wall will have the Temple Gate of course. - Nice one, happy 4/1!  
Would you be able to store my camp members as well? This would eliminate transportation issues for some of them.  
Can you clean dirty hippies? I always seem to have one in camp...Never know what to do with him.  
I've been waiting for the opening of Burning Man Spas for... exactly a year! I've written my check already.  
.....who are you trying to kid? This can't be real.....there's nothing about this on the BM website! - LOL.....must be April Fool's Day.....!  
BWAAAAHHHAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAA!!!! - Love it.  
Awesome work man, as always!  
You know, I have been anticipating this for about a month now. It makes me smile and realize just how close I am to home. The first time, I nearly pissed myself I was so angry - I can't remember what it was, maybe cell phones? Ha! That was many many years ago, now. Happy April Fools, my friend, but you didn't fool me!  
Haha - good one! #AprilFool  
The way a joke works is that you don't give away the punch line until people have heard the joke. Being "in the know" means you should be quiet about the "punch line" until people fall for the joke.  
They really went all out for this one. Click on some of the links.  
Also, did they miss the irony of making "Berlin" a gated community?  
oh dear.....you sound so bummed. you know what day this is right??  
Berlin, Moscow & Tokyo. That's an inside joke; those are the names of the Ranger camps. I wonder if they were inferring that the Rangers would be the "security".  
Your websites made it to the Staff list...Well done!  
People do every year, but then you smarty pants go ahead and blab about how it's so funny or how people don't fall for these before most people get a chance to even SEE them...  
No one falls for these anymore, Scott. We seriously need some fresh meat.  
Hey, I'm all for this gated community thingee. But along with the guards we'll also need video cameras, lots of video cameras. We have to also check everyone's ID. We can't let in terrorists in if they don't have an ID. And, maybe we could entice our beloved Sheriff Joe to conduct a non-discriminatory, illegal camper sweep. And, we should also get one of those full body scanners that seem to be the rage at all the airports. We could have everyone go through, even if they don't have clothes on.  
Finally, some real comfort! This will make it much easier to talk the jocks at the high school reunion into coming.  
Only real giveaway is in Disclaimer contained with each website. But yes, nicely done. Better than some non-joke websites out there...  
You are SOO funny!  
Well, I for one have been had. Good one.  
I had 4 April fools jokes attempted on me before 8am. I was pretty sure this was one too.  
Check the date... April Fools!!!  
take a deep breath and remember where and when you are. it is Thursday, April first in Massachusetts, USA. - Playa lies are not the only lies.  
This is one of those traditions that makes me proud to call myself a Burner.  
Dude - I didn't blab, I commented ON the blab. Big difference. The seal had been broken.  
Unfortunately, like Scotto, people are starting to expect such notes from me -- so I may have to coordinate with someone else to send it out next year. - Keep up the good work Scotto!!  
And I always send out Scotto's sites to other BM lists and at least two or three people bite :)  
So just how MANY domains do you buy and set up each year???? Happy April Fools Day Scotto.  
Not to mention that one of the wonders of Burning Man is meeting people totally randomly. For instance, in 2007, a random girl wandered through my camp, sat down and had a drink with us, and told us a story about how she had just come from the Post Office, where she'd mailed her grandmother a letter about how she had just been standing under the double rainbow (remember that?), soaked in beet juice (courtesy of the beet people), wearing a paper Mache unicorn head. It really kind of made our day.  
This is, to my mind, appalling.  
I understand that people are concerned about their stuff, but security checking IDs!?! Can't people just self-sufficiently put up their own fences, and radically rely on their own camp members to keep the riff raff out?  
It's over. It really is over...  
This is hilarious, and you put some time into this! Has anyone written you yet about it being released on April 1? I expected to see more chatter about it – I’m curious if anyone got the joke? Made them mad enough to sell their BM ticket!?  
YOU make be grin mighty wide!